Immortel (ad vitam). Really, mr. Bilal? Really?

Bre Rhetto, tocma eram gata sa comentez la Burn After Reading, ultima dracie a lu fratii Cohen (trecute sunt vremurile de glorie de la Big Lebowsky, daca e sa ma-ntrebi pe mine, desi Brad Pittis iar face un rol bun) cand dau peste ceva care ma face sa reactionez negativ. Cum am vrut ca toata planeta sa auda strigatul meu de protest si tu dormeai (de ce asa mult, Rhetto, de ce?), am apelat la bunul nostru vecin de palier Bogdan din South Carolina ca sa traduca zbieretele mele.

Dear Mr. Enki Bilal. This is a letter to you from me, sister Veta Marx, accomplished film critic from Romania. Mr. Bilal, I have come across your excellent work as an illustrator and also writer of your own comic books during my trips to Paris. Even though I’m nothing but an old woman, it is with joy and happiness that I recall those long hours in the FNAC, sitting down on the floor with your „Foire aux immortels” and shitting my pants as I saw what a staggering drawer you are. However, to my shame only recently I found out that you made your comics into a few movies, Mr. Bilal. And not only that, but you also directed three of them. To my horror, I watched the last one. You know, the one mentioned in the title of this post. To be honest, I do hope that being a modern (and model) citizen of this world, you’ll see my scribblings here.  Of course, you surely do surf the internet. How could you do such a big shit, mr. Bilal? How, and most of all WHY?! Your so-called movie don’t make even the slightest sense, mr. Bilal. Didn’t you have anything else better to do? I find that hard to believe. The script is BAD, the dialogue is even WORSE, the CGI (which mostly looks like shit) ain’t motivated by any rules of dramatic  writing or character development, and above all your knowledge  on Egyptian deities is a JOKE! In other words, what you made here, mr. Bilal, is a HUGE CRAP! How could those actors actually work for you? How come that anyone gave you money (huge wads of cash I assume) for this NONSENSE? Fortunately 4 long years have passed since this mistake of yours and look, you didn’t scare us again with a new cinematic „work of art”. Keep it like that, mr. Bilal and stick it with the comics. Don’t touch the film camera again, because it’s FELONY, and I’m a have you in court, mr. Bilal! Believe me, I’m not upset but you really scared me and I’m scared of being scared because I’m old and scared old people might actually die!!

Lasă un comentariu

Niciun comentariu până acum.

Comments RSS TrackBack Identifier URI

Lasă un răspuns

Completează mai jos detaliile tale sau dă clic pe un icon pentru a te autentifica:

Logo WordPress.com

Comentezi folosind contul tău WordPress.com. Dezautentificare /  Schimbă )

Fotografie Google

Comentezi folosind contul tău Google. Dezautentificare /  Schimbă )

Poză Twitter

Comentezi folosind contul tău Twitter. Dezautentificare /  Schimbă )

Fotografie Facebook

Comentezi folosind contul tău Facebook. Dezautentificare /  Schimbă )

Conectare la %s